Having been on my own long and emotional journey of trying to conceive over many years, I am now in a very different chapter of my life, having accepted that it wasn’t meant to be. As a professional coach, I want to share my strategies and lessons from my own experiences to help others who may be in a similar situation (as I know there are many of you out there!). One thing I fundamentally believe is that you can still live the life you truly deserve and be the best version of you, regardless of where you find yourself today.
I personally didn’t discover any suitable, specialist or objective coaching support during my own journey (particularly in the acceptance space). This is why one of my own passionate goals is to share and acknowledge that a) it’s okay to not have children amidst many social expectations, pressures (some direct and indirect) and norms, and b) you can still lead a purposeful and fulfilling life when you are ‘childless not by choice’.
I live in Englefield Green (Surrey, UK) and am married to my lovely husband Rich – we have made a big decision in the last couple of years to ‘be free’ and shake off the monthly bind of trying for a baby and to now accept where we are in life. Oh, and by the way, we fell into that very unhelpful ‘category’ of ‘unexplained infertility’ (i.e. that generic catch all label when the medical professionals have no other reason to give you), so part of my acceptance has stemmed from giving up looking for a ‘reason’ of why we haven’t conceived.
That acceptance has been a massive physical, mental and emotional shift for us both (me in particular); I am more excited now than ever before about living our lives to the full, both today and in the future. I believe my newly discovered purpose is to embrace the beautiful simplicity of life, to have as much fun in the process as possible, and to share my own experiences to help others in similar situations.
My favourite quote, framed in my office, which catches my eye daily is: “When you love what you have, you have everything you need”, and I get a little warm and fuzzy feeling inside knowing it’s this gratitude, which drives me and my purpose.